You are the average of the people you spend the most time with. As an
athlete how do you feel when you think about the other players on your
team? Notice how it feels in your body when you think that thought. Are
you sensing tightness or expansion in your body? The feeling you are
having is an indication of whether you have the right people on your
team.
Sometimes the opportunity appears where you get to choose
the team you want to be on. Recently I spent a long weekend with a team I
thought I really wanted to join. I believed in the head coach and the
way he was able to work with other people was exceptional. He really had
a gift to see beyond the surface. His approach helped others to reach
deep down to find the desire to step up and play a bigger game. The
opportunity to be around a coach who knew how to bring out the best in
others was very attractive.
As time went on, however, I realized
something felt off center. There was a feeling in my gut which wouldn't
go away. Instead of ignoring it, I paid attention. It would be easy for
me to tell myself that it was nothing. Experience has taught me to
follow my hunches.
Too often I have had a gut feeling, did not listen and later regretted my actions. Have you done that, too?
After
several days of being with this team, wondering why I wasn't more
excited, I decided to take the next step. Talking to the two assistant
coaches about my goals, the way I was hoping the team would challenge me
and the steps I planned to take was revealing. There was a disconnect.
What
I realized was that I was ready to step up and play a BIGGER game than
they were expecting. My aspirations, my abilities were further along
than the other players. The assistant coaches I would be working with
directly were not sure if they could challenge me enough based upon
their current level of coaching.
Several of the other players were
limited by their fear. They knew they were stepping out of their
comfort zone. I could see their desire to take a leap into the unknown.
Their fear, however, continued to have a strong grip on them.
I
know how scary it is to be ready to take a big risk. It feels as if you
are standing right on the edge of the cliff. I had been there too. And
continue to go there again and again.
What I witnessed was an
internal fight occurring. One part of these players were ready to break
free of their limitations to play a bigger game. The other part was
very, very scared of letting go of something old, familiar and
comfortable. A strong internal battle occurring can make it very
difficult to think clearly.
Yes, many of these players were ready
to take the risk. They were ready to move forward. Once you've had a
taste of what is possible it is difficult to turn back, especially when
you have the right team supporting you along the way. So much more is
possible when you are hooked up with your dream team.
After some
deep soul searching I realized I was trying to make myself fit into a
team where I really didn't belong. It is like wanting to be on the B
team because the coach is wonderful, and you'll be a superstar, but you
know you really belong on the A team.
This goes back to the saying
by Jim Rohn, "you are the average of the five people you spend the most
time with." Teaming up with people who were not playing at my level or
above was going to be too easy. I wouldn't be challenged enough.
My
decision was not to take the easy route. It would slow down my rate of
mastery. Instead I decided to gracefully bow out, and continue looking
for my ideal dream team..
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