A Quick Mental Script for Building Resilience

By Steve Horan, PositiveSports.net
 
Resilience is the ability to bounce back from a setback - ideally, even stronger than before.  Needless to say, resilience is a critical life skill in athletics and beyond.
Some athletes struggle with resilience not because they are weak or uncommitted, but because they take their performance very seriously,  When they fall short, they feel badly, and this affects their future performance. We can help our athletes strengthen their resilience by teaching them a four-step mental script for putting mistakes in perspective and moving forward.

• This is not catastrophic. If your athlete is feeling a serious loss of confidence or a sense of guilt about their performance, teach him that it is only a game, perfection is not an option, and no performance error is ever catastrophic in the overall context of life. 
• This is not pervasive.  If your athlete is feeling that 'all I do is make mistakes,' teach her that her mistakes are not as pervasive as she thinks, and back that up with a list of valuable contributions she brings to the team.
• This is not permanent.  If your athlete feels that his mistakes have put him in a permanent state of low performance, teach him him that mistakes and slumps are part of the game and they are not permanent.  Also assure him of your confidence and desire to see him bounce back.
• This is not defining.  If your athlete feels that her mistakes or low performance define her as a person, reassure her that she is valued as a person regardless of her athletic performance, and teach her that no athlete should ever define her personal worth in terms of her athletic performance.
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Most importantly, teach your athletes to use this four-step script whenever they feel a loss of confidence or a sense of guilt over performance errors.  To make it easier, teach them the phrase 'this is not CPPD'  (catastrophic, pervasive, permanent, or defining) whenever they are struggling with performance. This mental script, backed with your affirmation and role modeling, will help them bounce back quicker and stronger, and become more resilient athletes and people.